I am part of the Never Unfriended Launch Team and a Dayspring affiliate. Links in this post will earn me just a bit of an income if you choose to purchase from me. All opinions listed are 100% my own.
Earlier this year, I was extremely wounded by someone who I thought was a good friend. The incidents that occurred hurt me in ways I cannot even begin to tell you.
My heart hurt because my intentions were good at what I was doing, but the person involved on the other end took what I was saying the wrong way and basically unfriended me for a while. Not only did this person unfriend me, but by telling other people her version and not keeping it between us, she caused many other people to unfriend me as well.
I am not going to lie. It hurt — bad. I cried. I prayed. I doubted my intentions since everyone around me seemed to be upset. I withdrew from people at church and activities I was involved in, and I basically said to myself, “I am done being a friend”.
Then I was sent Never Unfriended in the mail and at that moment from page 1, my healing began.
About Never Unfriended
While we are all hungry for friendship, it’s the fear of feeling awkward and being rejected, left out, or hurt (again) that often keeps us from connecting. What if we knew we could NEVER by unfriended? Would we risk friendship then?
Starting with that guarantee from the most faithful friend who ever lived—Jesus—this book is a step-by-step guide to friendships you can trust. It answers the questions that lurk under the surface of every friendship—What are we afraid of? What can’t we change? What can we change? And where do we start? In her new book, Never Unfriended, Lisa-Jo Baker shares personal stories and practical tips to help you make the friends, and be the friend, that lasts.
When I first started reading this book, I cried. Every page made me cry — like ugly cry because for the past 16 years, I have been hurt numerous times by people who are supposed to know how to nurture friendships. And you know what? I did not always handle myself well.
~I retaliated by speaking ill against someone
~I snubbed the lady who had taken what I said the wrong way instead of extending her grace
~I allowed my flesh to handle the situation instead of taking my hurts to Jesus
That last one is a doozie and the one that through this last relationship that was hurt I have learned a lesson or two.
In Lisa Jo’s book, she writes in 15 chapters, breaking them into 4 parts:
- Part 1: What Are We Afraid Of?
- Part 2: What Can’t We Do about It?
- Part 3: What Can We Do about it?
- Part 4: Where Do We Start?
Part 1 goes into PTSD of friendships and this is where I really started to see the light. You know how you feel once you get hurt — you start building walls so that you never get hurt again. But really — do we want to live this way? Fearful of every relationship, ready to walk away at a moment’s notice because someone took what we said the wrong way?
How we handle these situations and our emotions is what sets the tone for an a bad breakup, or like in my case, the situation diffused itself and now everyone is okay again.
I learned this time around to take my hurts straight to Jesus. In her book, Lisa teaches us how to righteously deal with the issues that arise that can cause a friendship to fall apart.
After Being Hurt – How Do You Get Past the Awkward Conversations?
To come alongside the release of Never Unfriended, DaySpring has included the introduction of the Conversation Starter Jar!
Once you make amends in a relationship that was strained, you know how you have those moments of awkward conversation. Inside the conversation jar, there are over 60 questions that can lighten the mood and help get things moving in the right direction.
A few sample questions:
- ”What do you feel when someone shows up at your door unannounced?
- “What’s one dream that you’ve set aside for the moment?
- “Have you ever been pulled over by the police?”
- “What’s something you’ve tried, that you’ll never, ever try again?”
- “When was the last time you astonished yourself?”
The Conversation Start Jar is a great idea for any gathering where you need an ice-breaker, you want to really get to know the people you’ve just met, or going deeper into friendships!
Grab Yours While It’s On Sale!
The special introductory price is 30% off with Free Shipping. The book is marked down to $13.99 (originally $16.99), and you can grab the book and the conversation starter jar with free shipping when using code FREESHIP. This special introductory offer is available 4/5 – 4/9.
If you are at a place that you have been hurt, I encourage you to grab this book and let Lisa Jo’s word soothe the pain and offer you tips and tricks to heal from being unfriended and know that through Jesus, you are Never Unfriended.