I was that woman.
You know the ones you read about–the angry, the bitter, the revengeful woman.
That was me many years ago.
I hate the fact that I used to be that angry.
I guess what started me thinking about this subject was a comment left by a reader. Tasha replied to my post Has Anger Got You Cornered and this was her response:
It sounds really good, but its not that easy to just stop being angry all the time…especially depending on the situation you are in…I am angry i mean really angry all the time some days are better than others and i can make it stop but most i can’t
Tasha, I totally can relate to what you are saying. I did a Bible study once entitled, Making Love Last Forever by Gary Smalley. It is not one that I wanted to take, but I did it because my husband and I needed help and that was what he chose for us to do. In the end, I am glad I did this Bible study because it is the one that made the most difference in my relationship with my husband.
Chapter 2 in this Bible study deals strictly with anger and as soon as we hit that subject, my flesh, my mind–everything in me balked! I did not want to complete this chapter, but I did. And when I finished, what I found out was that deep–way down deep within me, I was harboring extreme anger at some things that had happened to me during my childhood that I had not dealt with yet. I was angry at my mom and for the way our relationship had turned out. I was angry at the abuse I had received from family members who were supposed to love me unconditionally. I was angry at EVERYTHING! This in turn, made me take out all my frustrations and anger on everyone around me.
One day God spoke to my heart and said–“Go confront the issues that are causing your anger“. I was afraid because of who was involved. The day that it all happened, I have never been so violent with my words, I had never been more hysterical in my entire life, but when I was through and completely spent from sharing all my hurt and anger with the persons involved, it was like this shroud of anger just lifted and in its place was nothing more than peace.
Today, if you are struggling with anger my friend, I totally get what you are going through. I have been there. I have walked the path and I have the scars to prove it. I can also tell you that if you will trust God to see you through it, you will come out better on the other side.
Please know that I don’t have it altogether. There are some days that I still have meltdowns. The difference is that now they are few and far between instead of several anger outbursts each day.
- Search deep within yourself and find out what is feeding that anger. You will be surprised at the things God will show you.
- Confront them
- Ask God to now fill those places with peace
If you would like to talk with me further about the anger issue or any other types of issues you may be dealing with, simply email me and let me know!