It can get on top of us from time to time; life is one of those things that is as overwhelming as it is fantastic. And sometimes, we have that feeling we aren’t in control of it. Have you ever had that dream where you are driving, but the car isn’t doing anything you want it to? This dream usually signifies that you feel you aren’t in control of your life. Sometimes, it’s the little aspects we need to reassess so we can regain control, but sometimes there are bigger fish to fry. So, let’s have a look at some of the important ways in which you can take the power back.
Look At Your Weaknesses… And Strengthen Them
As we get older, we naturally hit certain traumas and stresses in our lives, but it’s how we handle these issues that will give us the resilience we need to endure. Usually, people tend to ignore certain little niggles that, if left untreated, can manifest into bigger stresses and anxieties. These could be things like your job, your relationships, or even your personal outlook.
And it’s your relationships with people that will give you the signals that something needs to change. Either you find yourself clashing with people, or you’ll find yourself having grown out of relationships with friends. But you’ll find that you are still attached to them for some inexplicable reason. By addressing the weaknesses in your life, you will pinpoint where your life is veering off course. We all feel anxiety or depression at some point, and we can struggle with how to address it. So, think about getting professional help, doctors are there for you. But also, look at exactly are the weaknesses in your life, are there things holding you back? Once you figure out what they are, you can do something about them.
Do You Have Regrets?
We all have regrets in some way, but the difference between those who continue to bemoan their life didn’t do something about those regrets when they had the chance. Sometimes, we have a task that seems to escape our clutches. And yes, it’s very easy to say “go for it and achieve your dreams”, but this can require a lot of sacrifice. It’s better, when you have a life regret, to do something about it while you are young and more care-free.
The problem with being young is that people place too much pressure on themselves nowadays. If you have regrets, look at remedying them in some way. And it is better late than never. Some people don’t begin driving lessons until they are in their 30s or 40s. And for something that’s a key skill, it is something that will open up a lot of freedom for you. If you have the willpower, you can make these things happen. Yes, a lot of people have regrets about not learning to drive sooner, or going to college, but there are ways around them. Yes, there are financial barriers, but where there’s a will, there’s a way.
Play The Game
The game of life is an incredibly complex thing. But if you have goals you want to achieve in life, such as getting married, buying a home, and raising a family, some obstacles can get in your way of achieving these goals. Believe it or not, your credit score is one of the most important things to think about. And if your credit score is in good condition, this means you will have a lot of opportunities for bank loans, financial support, and you will be able to get yourself out of trouble or buy that house or car you’ve really wanted.
This means playing the game. Lots of people don’t like to play the game and conform in this sense, but unfortunately, it is the way of the world, and so it’s best for you to learn the rules before breaking them. So, do what you need to do to get a house, such as saving up for that deposit, getting the paychecks in that job that you don’t like. And then, once you’ve got the house and saved up some money, you can go start that business, go freelance or self-employed, and achieve those goals. You need the security blanket in many ways, and this means playing the game for a little bit.
Do You Know What You Really Want?
Lots of us feel helpless and not in control because we have no idea where to go next. In playing the game of life, finding out these goals gives us far more meaning to life. And it may not even be a career-oriented goal, it could be something in life, like having children. But if you don’t know what you want in life, this will contribute to a feeling of helplessness and not feel like you are in control of anything! Unfortunately, to solve these types of problems, you need to live life a little bit more.
Lots of people tend to live vicariously or ramble through life without an aim. But, it’s important for you to live your life; your purpose will find you. Yes, and as hippie-esque as that sounds, sometimes people don’t know what they want to do until in their 40s or 50s. If you can enjoy your life, and make sure you are having as positive an experience as you can, it will certainly make its way to you. Remember, life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.
Change What You Can Control
Sometimes we have such a poor opinion of ourselves, it boils down to something trivial from the perspective of others, but it’s a big thing for us. Something like our body shape, like feeling overweight, is one of those things that makes a lot of people unhappy. But, newsflash, you can change this! Yes, people go on diets constantly, and then they end up going back to the drawing board.
But, in going for a major change, it takes a long time! The reason we all give up our diets and go back to our miserable existence is because it’s not happening quickly enough. In getting fit and healthy, it’s a long journey. And if you’ve got specific aims, such as gaining strength or muscle, you need to put in the hours. Some people are happy being sad, and some people talk themselves out of going to the gym for a trivial reason. But those people who sincerely want to make a change in their lives need to begin now, and not beat yourself up if you fall off the wagon on occasion. The important thing is always to get back on it. This is how you will regain control.
Be disciplined about every aspect that you want to change. So, for example, if you want some more “me” time, be strict about it. If you want to go and exercise, put it in your diary, find a way to motivate you to go so you cannot get out of it. Discipline breeds regime, which breeds structure, which breeds a sense of control over your life.
Now, you may feel that you would be bound by your timetable, but this timetable is of your own doing. But at the very outset, the structure may be the thing to help you regain control. And it doesn’t have to be military discipline, you may want to learn how to play an instrument, go for a walk, read a book, but say to yourself that you will do these things. And this is the fundamental principle of gaining control of your life.
It’s a long road, but for those people who don’t feel they are in control of their life, it’s about building it bit by bit.