I just returned from a whirlwind trip to New York that was supposed to be an entire week spent laughing, eating, and rubbing elbows with bloggers and PR brands. Instead, I sit here, heart broken for a friend who lost her husband suddenly on Tuesday.
Monday morning, Crystal Faulkner and I headed out to New York. We had been planning this trip for months and were looking forward to it.
We arrived without a hitch and we had THE most amazing Monday you could ever dream of. We walked all over the city of New York snapping photos of everything.
We ate at Southern Hospitality BBQ (which is owned by Justin Timberlake) — and the food was truly Southern and simply delicious.
Then we got up on Tuesday and decided to head to 5th avenue to check out the shopping. We were floored at prices when we walked into Barney’s and saw a coat for $18,000. Yes — you read that number right.
We high tailed it out of there and decided to head to Little Italy and eat some authentic Italian food.
We found a quaint little bistro style restaurant so we sat down to eat and the bottom dropped out of the sky! Thankfully we were covered and we enjoyed our food.
I ordered a delicious pumpkin ravioli in sage butter sauce — so so good y’all.
After eating, we decided to walk to Chinatown since it was right around the corner.
And that is where our fun trip ended.
Crystal bought her husband some of his favorite oolong tea. She was so excited and called home to tell him about it. Her daughter answered the phone and went to wake up their dad so Crystal could talk to him.
But he had passed away during the night — at age 33.
As I stood there watching and listening to this scene unfold, I was in shock and disbelief. I said to myself — surely this cannot be happening! She just talked to him the night before. This is crazy!
Oh but friend — it did happen, and at that moment my heart broke in pieces for my friend. I didn’t know what to say or what to do. This was the first time I had ever been with someone when they received news of someone dying.
We made our way back to the hotel as quickly as possible and got to the airport to get her home.
She made it all the way home the same day and I am so thankful for that.
Me on the other hand, I had to spend the night in the airport because of storms and plane delays and missed connecting flights, but I think God orchestrated it that way for a reason.
He needed to give me some time to think about my own life and everything going on and that had just transpired.
I’ve told everyone this — when you watch someone go through a death, your perspective on life and the things in your life change drastically.
Gone are the goals and dreams to be on top and be the best. Gone are the silly notions that I want to be famous.
All I want is to live my life as a child of God and as a great wife and mother to my kids.
Watching Crystal go through all of this — all I wanted to do was to get home and throw my arms around my husband and never let go.
God showed me through all of this the kind of wife that I was turning into and honestly y’all — it was not pretty. I had gotten to the point where we were fighting all the time, I was complaining about him to God, and I kept telling myself we were broken and I was not happy.
It wasn’t that WE were broken, but that I was broken and had on these skewed glasses of what life was supposed to be like.
This lesson in watching my friend go through losing her husband was a serious wake up call to me. I removed those glasses, got down on my knees in that empty airport and cried my heart out to God and asked Him to forgive the kind of wife that I had become. And you know what? He did.
Today I am a new person. Gone is that mean spirited wife I was turning into. In it’s place is a wife with a grateful heart. It took the death of a friend’s husband to shake me and wake me up.
Ladies — let’s wake up. If you are like me and finding faults with your marriage — stop. Pray, and ask God to show you if it’s really the marriage or if it is really just you.
For me — it was me. But not anymore.
Pray for Crystal
Crystal is in such pain so please don’t overwhelm her with questions, etc. Pray for her and let her know how much we all love her. This is going to be one of the toughest things she has ever went through. I cannot imagine the pain she is feeling.
She could use our prayers and love right now.